For a long time, I have been busy with this and that, I thought about blogging, but somehow I was always too tired to get it done.
I wanted to blog more often, at least once a week, it's just harder to get it done, than you'd think.
I apologize once again, for not updating more often.
From December 2012, I have lived in Japan, I spent the first 3 months in Nagano, at a skiing resort, working at a restaurant for very little money. It was OK and I got to ski a lot, which I enjoyed very much. I also loved being in the beautiful nature in the mountains of Hakuba.
After that job ended, I went to Tokyo area, and settled down just outside of Tokyo in a shared house.
Then I started working as an English teacher, doing all sorts of teaching jobs, at one point I had like 5 different jobs. I also traveled a lot around Japan, and went to many interesting places.
I did my best to send out my demo to all the music companies that I could find online, and I was contacted by one Shibuki, from Zelfstanding, an independant record company.
He offered med a possibility to sing and build up an audience, by entering the monthly amateur live show "That's Dream Collection". I had some fun with performing live a couple of times at this little live house in Ikebukuro. It was a good experience for me, but I could never gather enough people to come and see me.
You see, everyone I know here in Japan is either a student or really busy working, and nobody seems to have the time or the money to go to Tokyo and pay 2500 yen for the entrance, to see me sing approximately 15 minutes. So naturally, I never really had an audience, and nobody would vote for me as crowd favorite, seeing that everyone had come to see someone else in the show, and would naturally vote for them.
It really didn't get me anywhere closer to my dream.
Then I was offered to do the theme song of a new anime, but the production was delayed because of problems with the artist, and thus is now on hold. I guess I won't be singing the theme song anytime soon.
In August I participated in World Karaoke Grand Prix (Anisong version) and I won 2nd place. I was really happy, and life seemed to be going great. The show was broadcast live in on Japans biggest site for videos, "Nikonikodouga". It was even broadcast on TV, the TV Aichi channel.
The next day, my grandfather's younger sister, Lone, whom we've always had a close relationship to, but over the past years it grew stronger, died from lung cancer.
I went home to attend the funeral. It was a really sad time for all of us. I stayed in Denmark for two weeks, and went to see most of my friends and family.
Then I returned to Japan, and my friends started visiting me from Denmark. Things started to lighten up a bit, and I felt that I might be able to return to a regular life...
In October, I had to leave everything behind for a while and go home to Denmark, as my grandmother had gotten terminally ill, it was very sudden, a dissected aorta, and the doctors were unable to do anything, but keeping her blood pressure down.
I went home on the 19th of October, 3 days after she was hospitalized and stayed by her side, until she passed away on the 27th of October. I just couldn't believe that she died, it was just wrong and unfair.
She could have had at least another 10 years of happy life with us, she was so sad, and full of regret on her deathbed, she told me, how she would have loved, to have had just a few more years with my grandfather, how she regretted, that they never got around to going on their hotel stay (they had gotten a gift card for their 80th birthday in the summer). She told me never to postpone what you want to do...and never to wait for something to happen. But to make it happen.
May her soul rest en peace.. How I miss her, how we all miss her.
Since then I have been questioning what I am doing. I want to live for my dream, and follow it wherever it leads me, but at the same time, I am leaving my loved ones behind.
She told me to live now, and with no regrets.
I am trying to do just that.
I wrote a song for her, which I will be recording soon. It's called "The guiding Star"
I will post the lyrics in another post.
"never live life with regret"
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| In Memory of two great ladies! You are sorely missed! |
